Friday 27 January 2017

Daniel 100 WC

One day, a boy named Jelly is going to school, on the way to his school he saw a black van coming closer and closer and, he try to run away but he can't, he is not fast enough and he is caught and 2 hour later his was in a steel room he can't get out of the room he is so tearful he try to dig under the room that is steel and mauve and there a carrot in the room and a man come in the room and Jelly pick in the carrot and like the man

2 comments:

Mr Paul said...

I like that you have tried to use commas to structure your work, don't forget full stops too.

Ploy said...

Don't forget the full stop after the word man.