Wednesday, 25 January 2017
Primary cooking competition
I wore my mauve colored apron and got the steel knife out of the cupboard. I cut the carrots into small pieces and put them in the box. I then started to slice the onions, my eyes got tearful so I got the tissue from under the sink and wiped my eyes. I finished cutting the onions and put it in the box with the carrots. I mixed it together and poured it into the rest of the salad. I placed my salad on Mrs.Sparks desk. Serena came in third place, I came in second and Jenny won first place.
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5 comments:
Good use of the 5 words, it feels natural and not forced at all.
Hi Joanna,
I REALLY like your story. It is very good and factual. I like that in the ending part you said... Serena came in third place, I came in second and Jenny won first place. I liked that it was different from other stories. I really don't know what you need to improve on!!!!
From your good friend, Leah
You don't have to improve your story it is...AMAZING.I love it so much.
keep up the good work because I like the sen tens that you wrote like I slice the onions ,my eye got tearful so I got the tissue from under the sink.
I like the plot of your story because it makes the reader want to read it.Good job Joanna
from Gianna
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