Friday, 20 January 2017
Bingbing 100 writing chllenge
One day in Thailand one Dog is hot for no more snow now is hot the dog need to drink a water the dog has to find water the dog need to go to the ocean the dog use the long time to get to ocean the dog look in ocean and now dog drink a water and the dog go back and back to dog home and dog get the water back and now the dog sleep for next day and the snow are come back now for next day the dog so happy now.
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6 comments:
I'm glad the dog found some water to have a drink.
Don't forget to use "As the weather changed..." as part of your writing.
You should also use more full stops to show where sentences start and end.
The ending part is my favorite.
Try not to use lots of "the dog...".
Hi Bing Bing,
I really like that the story is about a dog.
But for next time, try to use more punctuation in your story.
You forgot a comma next time don't forget it.
where one day in Thai land,
I like how the dog got snow again remember to add more punctuation next time.
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